Charisma Ave; Love Blvd


Sometime ago I overheard a conversation between two young women about how men today is lacking and oftentimes come looking for a handout.

I find that this might be the exception in some cases but DEFINITELY not the rule. Let’s discuss the rule. THE RULE should be we give equally in a relationship not one man/woman steering the ship. If he is the bread winner what’s wrong with being the home maker? Therefore creating a balance…I’m not saying ignore women rights,you see a relationship is a job in itself and can only succeed when both parties are committed wholeheartedly. It is true that the raging fires that sets your heart ablaze in the first 3-6 months have the potential to become just a flickering ember.It is up to the individuals to make sure that hickory logs is keeping the fire ablaze!

Many folks I’ve spoken to said that they no longer go out on date nights or even dress up to impress their significant other. Have you ever seen a peacock in all its glory? As beautiful and REGAL that bird is it still spreads it’s enchanting tail to attract the attention of a potential mate. We are the ones who are guilty of  throwing water on our own fires without realizing until it is too late.Then there’s the black women who berate their black men by stating he’s no good. I’ve heard this phrase roll off the tongue of women who are caught up in their emotions or ideas of what a black man should be. If a man doesn’t value the relationship or add to your life why do you stay?  When last have you reminded him why you chose him? When last you told him you love him just because? When last you hugged him assuring him there is safety in your arms? Compliments makes anyone feel good and it goes for both parties involved.

I once had a conversation with my father about the men that I was choosing always falling short of my expectations. I recall his response  being…”perhaps you are shopping in the wrong aisle for the thing you’re looking for and if you’re in the right aisle then the problem is you.” We are ensnared by the words of our mouth and the meditation of our hearts said the great Bob Marley!
You see what we say about our husband, partner or significant other consciously or unconsciously will manifest itself, and while you may be very disappointed with the outcome please know it is exactly what you spoke into existence.

There is someone out there willing and quite able to love you FLAWS and all. If you have been stuck in the vicious cycle of relationships that derails before it gains momentum then first make sure you are attracting the man/ woman you want to spend your life with.


Before Mr/ Mrs wonderful arrives look at your cup ( representation of your life ) see if it is full enough to pour into someone else. You must bring something of value to a relationship. I’m not speaking about material or monetary things. Interveiw your own self and ask would I date me/or would I marry me?
If you fall short on your answers REPOSITION yourself and start again.

I said all that to say this a man will only give  what is require of him and a woman will only stay around if she knows you’re  capable to provide for the well-being of her heart, soul and home.


“Like any true architect to create a masterful and durable structure it starts with a design.”


Let me start by stating BE CAREFUL who you allow to design the structure of your life.
It is imperative that you make people a study not one that cosumes your entire day but one where you are sifting them out to see what their ulterior motive is.
A fire should be blazing in one’s belly to know when whatever is coming to them is/isn’t genuine.

You ask how do I develop such sense for this well here goes
1. Start spending quality time with yourself and I don’t mean pampering yourself I mean finding a connection with your higher self
Note:- Everyone is capable of this.

2.If you encounter any obstacle please remember that obstacles are really put in place to obscure ones sight (intuition) of the final outcome. Firstly, recognize that this is in fact a mini setback, sit down write down the way you expect the outcome to be and work towards executing it (short term goals)
Note:- Laziness never gets anyone anywhere.

3. STOP and I mean STOP sharing your intimate life experiences with EVERYBODY, SOMEBODY and NOBODY. At the end of the day people don’t  care about you as much as you do you. Eventually somebody is going to tell everybody and when the air clears nobody can really help your dire situation
Note:- A wise man keeps a still tongue.

To often we turn to religion in the hopes that the religious leader can help lead us into some sordid path of righteousness, or call a friend in the hopes that they will see things through your eyes when in fact they themselves are blind.

The only factual thing that I know that works is seeking the advice of the higher being who created you and imprinted in you an unfathomable depth of wisdom to know what one should ultimately do. Don’t get me wrong I’m not saying don’t ask for advice I’m merely saying that the final say so about YOUR LIFE should come from you and not be influenced by what others think or say. Put down the worries, release the cares, control the tongue and RULE your own world.





I was nominated  by Tracey a blogger who has the ability to slay in her writing and leave you wanting for more I can attest that in all of her blogs you’re left with knowledge and insight. “Thank you” doesn’t seem fit but I want you to know I’m eternally grateful and humbled by this award …Check out Tracey’s blogs at

Seven facts about me:-

1. I am the middle child of three girls and was catapulted into the role of the BIG sister not sure how or when it happened but my opinion matters in just about anything.

2. I eat the same thing for breakfast, lunch and dinner for fourteen consecutive days.

3. I never iron anything I’m wearing the way I see it; it will get wrinkled anyway.

4. I’ve watched phantom of the opera about a million times and I’m still awestruck as if I’m seeing it for the first time.

5. The original color of my hair is sugar brown.

6. I am a very private person with a public personality who loves a good party * it’s contradictory I know*

7. My blogging name is actually a pet name I am called by my parents, siblings and close friends who really knows and understands the back story of that name.


1. Nicole Lyons
Nicole writing has the abilities too transcend you to another time where the things that once lies dormant in you surfaces and leaves you introspecting yourself…a phenomenal writer.

2.Simply Etta D.  I was so happy when I discovered this blogger…her blogs are thought provoking as she leaves quotes that refreshes the spirit and fills the is my happy place when I visit her page

3. Kay Liz
Kay simply put is a renaissance woman who is well rounded in her writing she is a poet, an inspirational writer and she will take you on a journey that leaves you wanting more. Truly a pioneer for uplifting woman and I appreciate the rawness of her writing.

Please check out their blogs follow, like or comment. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do!